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I don’t want to sound like a bad person who enjoys a good media-friendly disaster, but I thought a situation where a major world capital is utterly paralyzed by a band of terrorists and at least a dozen world leaders are assassinated would be a lot more interesting. Instead, Babak Najafi’s sequel to Olympus Has Fallen is a tedious exercise in American exceptionalism by way of a video game, and when I say “American,” I only mean two: the indestructible president (Aaron Eckhart) and his super-duper Secret Service agent (Gerard Butler), who handily shoots every bad guy.

There’s so little plot that it’s hardly worth complaining. But it’s a state funeral in London that gathers all the leaders, and this prologue to the gun battle provided my two favorite moments: Despite the Most Intense Security of All Time, two leaders are blithely ignoring calls to get to the funeral on time: The French president is sulking in a vintage motorboat docked on the Thames, and the Italian prime minister is canoodling with a sweet young thing on the roof of Westminster Abbey. Nobody cried when they got blown up.